A couple of months ago, I went through a relationship transition with someone and we decided to work on a friendship together. Having shared so much, it seemed the right thing to do; why terminate a strong bond, especially if you are able to move on pretty quickly in other factors of the relationship? As time progressed though, it became apparent that much of the interaction was one-sided and looping, causing continual miscommunication, sadness and pain for both parties. As much as I wanted that person to be in my life, ultimately I had to let them go because of the negative impact they were having on my growth.
They did not do something specific, nor malicious. Just the act of them also trying to move on, caused colliding waves of unease, in the same way two stones thrown into a river, will create momentum which inevitably interacts in often chaotic ways, with the ripples from each others wake. At this point you have to make the decision, “How much personal pain am I willing to accept in the near-term, for the hope of a deeper connection in the future.” So I did make a choice and it came from a surprising perspective. Continue reading